Who am I?

Who am I?

Who am I is the question I ask myself
As I walk down the streets of the world.
The answer is unknown to me as my personality changes day to day.

All appearances deceive, they tell me
Yet mine seems not to
Perhaps it’s because mine changes with each person I meet.

You say I am trustworthy
So why do I not trust myself?
You claim that I know the path to life
So why do I feel as lost as Dorothy?

Who am I?
Who am I?
The mirror questions me
And I cannot answer it because
I am nothing beyond the eye.

In bed, I twist and turn
My sheets in a jumble
The monsters in my head rumble.

The nightmares possess me
The demons whisper all around me
Who is this person to be?

I lay in bed, scared
As my deepest fear threatens to become real
That it may be possible that all I am is nothing
That I am like water, changing shape with every object I am put in.

I helped others to find their humanity
But mine is lost to the wind.
How is that possible?

Am I a mirror who shows people themselves?
Am I the people pleaser who becomes anything to please people?
Who am I?
What am I?
These questions will be my undoing.

 

by Oyinkan Agboola

 

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2 Comments
  • Kwame
    Posted at 11:56h, 12 July Reply

    I enjoyed reading this, because I feel the same way. You captured the struggles of self discovery/identity crisis very well.

    But for one thing, I think that it’s not a bad thing to change a little with every person you meet. People are different, social settings are different. We all need to be mindful of that because staying solid and unmalleable like the rock can bery very detrimental to life. We can’t act the same way with old time friends as we do with our classmates with whom we only interact with when we have work to do.

    Although it needs to be said that it’s not always good to be water. Sometimes we need to be rock. `And the journey of life is designed for us to find out when exactly we need to switch it up. I think everyone keeps that in mind as well…..(i.e. there is a time for everything, and in this case) a time for every side of our personalities/dispositions.

    • Oyinkan Agboola
      Posted at 08:35h, 23 August Reply

      Wow! What a response. I completely agree with you. I wrote this with the fear of losing myself.
      Thank you very much for reading!

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